Highlighting uses, dosage, how to take & discontinue, side effects, pros & cons, and more

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Brand & Generic Names; Drug Classes

US brand name: Cymbalta
Generic name: duloxetine

Drug Class(es)

Primary drug class: Antidepressants
Additional drug class(es): Headache & Neuropathic Pain Medications, Anxiolytics / Anti-anxiety Medications, Serotonin and Norepinephrine Reuptake Inhibitors

Approved & Off-Label Uses (Indications)

Cymbalta’s US FDA Approved Treatment(s)

Major Depressive Disorder (MDD), Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), Fibromyalgia, Diabetic Peripheral Neuropathic Pain (DPNP) , Chronic Musculoskeletal Pain (CMSP)

Uses Approved Overseas but not in the US

Stress urinary incontinence in women in the EU under the trade name Yentreve.

Off-Label Uses of Cymbalta

Stress urinary incontinence in women, and possibly for men as well. ADD/ADHD. Smoking cessation. Migraines and other headaches .

When & If Cymbalta Will Work

Cymbalta’s Usual Onset of Action (when it starts working)

For Psychiatric Conditions (AKA brain cooties)

Between three days and a month, with an average of around two weeks.

For Pain

For DPNP & CMSP - like TCAs and any other med with a positive effect on norepinephrine, you could start feeling some relief anywhere from a couple of days to two-three weeks.

For fibromyalgia - how long does it take for anything to start working on fibro1?

Return to Table of Contents

Likelihood of Working

Depression & Anxiety Spectrum Disorders

As with most SNRIs, your chances are pretty damn good that Cymbalta will work for depression and anxiety spectrum disorders. They’re not the solution for everyone, but they all have a decent response rate, they are far less likely to poop-out than SSRIs, and Cymbalta is no different.

Pain

For DPNP & CMSP The odds are decent. It’s about as good as a TCA, with fewer side effects, which basically makes it a first-choice coin-toss.

For fibromyalgia - who the fuck knows. Even opioids may as well be placebos for a lot of people, and those folks are the Crazymeds’ demographic. And meds tend to poop-out (tachyphylaxis) a lot. I’ll get back to you if I can find some numbers I can trust.

Return to Table of Contents

Taking and Discontinuing

How to Take Cymbalta

Manufacturer’s Recommendations

Per the PI sheet Eli Lilly Recommends:
For adults with Major Depressive Disorder (MDD): start at 40 to 60 mg , taken either in one or two doses a day . The target dosage is 60mg a day, with a maximum of 120mg a day.
For adults with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD): start at 60 mg once a day , with a maximum of 120mg.

Crazymeds’ Suggestions

For MDD & GAD we suggest starting at 20mg a day, and increasing by 20mg a day as required. We also suggest taking Cymbalta twice a day due to its short half-life, but since you can take it only once a day at 20mg, if you need to increase your dosage you’ll know soon enough which works better for you.

While theoretically a once-a-day, delayed-release product, so is Depakote ER. And you only need to take regular Keppra twice a day. From all the evidence I’ve collected I’ve learned that you sometimes often need to take some meds more frequently than what the PI sheet states. And, please, discuss that with your doctor and pharmacist. The only real side effect to taking two 30 mg capsules instead of one 60 mg is how much it costs. Your doctor will probably be OK with it. You insurance company might have a different idea. Return to Table of Contents

How to Stop Taking Cymbalta (discontinuation / withdrawal)

Manufacturer’s Recommendations

What recommendations?

2.4 Discontinuing Cymbalta
Symptoms associated with discontinuation of Cymbalta and other SSRIs and SNRIs have been reported. A gradual reduction in the dose rather than abrupt cessation is recommended whenever possible [see Warnings and Precautions (5.7)]. --the PI sheet And that’s it.

Crazymeds’ Suggestions

Very slowly. Reduce your dosage by 10–20 mg a day each week. If 20mg per day every week is too fast, try to get some samples from your doctor2 so you can step down by 10mg per day until you hit 20mg. Cymbalta comes in 20, 30 and 60 mg capsules. Now do the math. Once you’re at 20mg you have to stop taking it after one or two weeks at that dosage. If the discontinuation symptoms don’t go away, ask your doctor for a Prozac prescription.

Return to Table of Contents

Cymbalta’s Pros and Cons

Pros

Works quickly with a fairly low side effect profile for an SNRI. Less likely to poop-out than an SSRI. Probably the best painkiller around as far as approved antidepressants are concerned (because Savella (milnacipran) is not approved in the US as an antidepressant). Return to Table of Contents

Cons

It’s an SNRI, which means a discontinuation syndrome from hell if you want/need to stop taking it. Return to Table of Contents

Interesting Stuff your Doctor Probably didn’t Tell You about Cymbalta

Cymbalta is more effective when taken in the morning than in the evening. This has nothing to do with meals, it all has to do with our circadian rhythms.

Smoking decreases Cymbalta’s bioavailability by about one-third. Eli Lilly doesn’t recommend any changes to how much you take or how fast to increase the dosage if you smoke, but don’t be surprised if you need to take more sooner than you thought. Return to Table of Contents

Best Known for

Not that much these days. It’s either the med approved for a much stuff as Prozac or Paxil, or the drug that makes you feel better enough to not celebrate with any alcohol because your liver could explode if you do. Return to Table of Contents




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Cymbalta’s Potential Side Effects

Potential Side Effects All Crazy Meds Have

No matter which neurological and/or psychiatric drug you take, you’ll probably get one or more of these side effects. These will usually be gone, or at least will diminish to the point where you barely notice it most of the time, within a week or two.

  • Headache
  • Drowsiness / fatigue - even when taking stimulants in some circumstances.
  • Insomnia, instead of or alternating with the drowsiness.
  • Nausea
  • Assorted other minor GI complaints (constipation, diarrhea, etc.)
  • Generally feeling spacey / out of it
    • Which can all add up to the ever-helpful “flu-like symptoms” listed as an adverse event on the PI sheet of practically every medication on the planet used to treat almost any condition humans and other animals could have.3
  • All crazy meds can, and probably will affect your dreams as well. There is no way of telling if that will be good or bad, let alone if this side effect is permanent or temporary.
  • Any of the above side effects you see listed again below means they’re even more likely to happen and/or stick around longer and/or are worse than most other meds.

Typical Potential Side Effects

The usual for SNRIs - headache, nausea, dry mouth, sweating, urinary hesitancy (it is a med for urinary incontinence after all), sleepiness or insomnia, diarrhea or constipation (my money is on the latter), weight gain, loss of libido and a host of other sexual dysfunctions. Most everything but the constipation, urinary hesitancy and weight gain, if any, will go away in a couple of weeks. As with most SNRIs sexual dysfunction is a coin toss, and many women will get a sexual boost instead of a sexual dampening. Return to Table of Contents

Uncommon Potential Side Effects

Controlled narrow glaucoma (but you already have to be at risk for eye problems to start with), elevated liver serum (your doctor should have you get an annual liver panel), blurry vision, muscle cramps, and weight loss (yes, that can be a problem).

Return to Table of Contents

Freaky Rare Side Effects

Retinal detachment. Excessive disturbing and disabling yawning. I guess they considered it “excessive and disturbing” because Lexapro wasn’t involved.

Return to Table of Contents

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What You Really Need to be Careful About

Do NOT drink alcohol when taking Cymbalta. Your liver could explode. Cymbalta is NOT like SSRIs where an occasional drink is OK, or SNRIs where you risk only turning into a raging alcoholic. Cymbalta + booze = a short-lived raging alcoholic.

Return to Table of Contents

Pregnancy Category

C-Use with caution Return to Table of Contents

Pharmacology

Cymbalta’s Half-Life & How Long Until It Clears Your System

Half-life: 12 hours over a range of 8 to 17 hours. Plasma Clearance: 3–4 days.

Steady State

Steady state is reached in 3 days.

Half-life is the average time it takes for you to process half of the drug’s active ingredient. If a drug has a half-life of around 24 hours and you take a dose of 100mg, you’ll have roughly the equivalent a 50mg dose after one day, a 25mg dose after two days, and so on. The rule of thumb is: multiply the half-life by five and you get how long it is for the dose you took to be cleared from your bloodstream4, so there’s nothing swimming around to attach itself to your brain and start doing stuff. That’s called “plasma clearance.” Complete clearance is a complex equation based on a lot of factors which may or may not: be published in the PI sheet, include personal data like your weight, or even completely figured out by corporate and independent researchers. It usually winds up being 2–5 days after plasma clearance no matter what5, but can take weeks. Sometimes a drug will clear from your brain and other organs before it clears from your blood.

Steady state is the flipside of half-life. This is when you can expect to get over side effects caused by fluctuating amounts of a medication in your bloodstream. Often, but not always the same amount of time as the plasma clearance above.

Return to Table of Contents

How duloxetine Works

the current best guess at any rate
Based upon the Communications Interference Hypothesis of depression, anxiety, and assorted other brain cooties, serotonin and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (SNRIs) like duloxetine effectively raise the serotonin (5-HT) and norepinephrine/noradrenaline (NE/NA) levels in your brain by letting your synapses soak in those tasty brain juices (neurotransmitters) for longer than usual by slowing (inhibiting) the mechanism of 5-HT and NE transmission deeper into the neurons (reuptake).

Return to Table of Contents

Active Ingredient

duloxetine hydrochloride


The active ingredient is usually the same as the generic name, but more often than not it’s a chemical salt of the substance identified as the generic. E.g. Fluoxetine is the generic for Prozac, but the active ingredient is fluoxetine hydrochloride (or HCl). It usually doesn’t make much of a difference outside of the more esoteric aspects of a drug’s pharmacology, but not always.

Return to Table of Contents

Shelf Life

3 years Return to Table of Contents

Cymbalta’s Noted Drug-Drug, Drug-Food & Drug-Supplement Interactions

  • Luvox ( fluvoxamine ). As both an SSRI and an extremely potent CYP1A2 inhibitor, taking Luvox and Cymbalta together could either save you or seriously mess you up. Or both.
  • Smoking can reduce the bioavailability and speed up the clearance of Cymbalta. It’s not known if you need to increase your dosage if you smoke. But as nicotine can reduce Cymbalta’s bioavailability by up to one third, and its bioavailability is only 50% to begin with, I imagine smokers (or however you indulge your nicotine habit) probably need more Cymbalta than the nicotine-free.
  • As an inhibitor of CYP2D6, Cymbalta interacts with about half the meds discussed on this site, tamoxifen , and a buttload of others in the world’s pharmacopeia.

Return to Table of Contents

Check for Other Drug-Drug, Drug-Food & Drug-Supplement Interactions Cymbalta may have at

Drugs.com’s drug-drug and drug-food interaction checker

It’s always a good idea to check for drug-drug interactions yourself. Just because most people in the crazy meds business know about really important interactions (e.g. MAOIs and a lot of stuff, warfarin and everything on the planet) doesn’t mean the person who prescribed your meds told you about them, or the pharmacist has all the meds you take at their fingertips like they’re supposed to. Or they have the time to do their jobs properly when not dealing with complete idiots or playing Angry Farmers on teh Faecesbooks.
Learn more about drug-everything interactions on our page of tips about taking crazy meds.



Name, Address, Serial Number (Generic and Overseas Availability)

Available in the US as a generic? Yes

Other Trade Names and Overseas Availability

Not including controlled/extended/sustained release suffixes (Efexor ER, Trevilor retard e.g.) or branded generics that are a hyphenate of the generic name and the drug company name (Apo-Citalopram e.g.).

Available as Cymbalta in These Countries

Argentina, Brazil, Chile, Colombia, EU, Ireland, Japan, Korea, Mexico, Peru, UK

Other Trade Names

  • Ariclaim - EU (diabetic peripheral neuropathy)
  • Duxetin - Argentina
  • Xeristar - Argentina, Chile, Mexico, Spain
  • Yentreve - EU (stress urinary incontinence)

Transliterated, Overseas Trade and Branded Generic Names

  • clorhidrato de duloxetina - Spanish-language INN
  • duloxetina como clorhidrato - another Spanish-language INN
  • Dakermina - Venezuela

Return to Table of Contents

Shapes & Sizes (How Supplied)

20 mg capsules , 30 mg capsules , and 60 mg capsules Return to Table of Contents

Comments, PI Sheet, Ratings, Reviews and More

Comments

In a rare case of useful information in advertising, Eli Lilly’s “Depression Hurts” campaign let people know that physical pain is a common symptom of MDD. It’s too bad that they dropped the part about all meds that are serotonin and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (including cheap-as-dirt TCAs) could help with depression-induced pain from the TV commercials. In fairness to Lilly, they did need to free up some time to address that bit about severe liver problems.

Cymbalta is vastly more potent than Effexor (venlafaxine) and Pristiq, so transitioning to or from either Effexor or Pristiq has to be done carefully. The estimated achievable equivalency is 20mg of duloxetine HCL = 50mg of desvenlafaxine succinate = 75mg of venlafaxine HCl. “Achievable” meaning, “based upon the dosages available.”

Cymbalta has gone from being the poster child for anti-antidepressant hysteria to being one of the top-prescribed drugs in the country. Although its use as an analgesic are as much responsible for that as its use as an antidepressant and anxiolytic (anti-anxiety drug). In fact, Lilly has positioned it primarily as a non-narcotic pain medication instead of a psychiatric medication. Why? Because there’s no stigma6 in having and taking medications for chronic pain, and less stigma = more money. Hey Lilly, ever thought about funding some anti-stigma campaigns that actually work?7


Return to Table of Contents

Rate Cymbalta

Give your overall impression of Cymbalta on a scale of 0 to 5.

Get all critical about Cymbalta

3.5 stars Rating 3.3 out of 5 from 234 criticisms.
Vote Distribution: 29 – 14 – 18 – 27 – 86 – 60


Rate this article

If you’re still feeling judgmental as well as just mental8, please boost or destroy my self-confidence by honestly (and anonymously) rating this article on a scale of 0 to 5. The more value-judgments the better, even if you can criticize my work only once.

Get all judgmental about the Cymbalta (duloxetine) Synopsis

4 stars Rates 4.0 out of 5 from 131 value judgments.
Vote Distribution: 5 – 4 – 3 – 12 – 60 – 47


Return to Table of Contents

Pages and Forum Topics Google Thinks are Relevant to Your Mental Health

Full US PI sheet, Global SPCs & PILs, Other Consumer Review & Rating Sites, and Other Sites that may be of Interest

Cymbalta’s Full US Prescribing Information / PI Sheet

Official Sites

  • Cymbalta’s official US site - This one harkens back to the early YIIKes! decade, when Big Pharma websites were full of sample packs, self-diagnosis questionnaires, and stuff that could be useful if they bothered to do some real work. C’mon guys, I know all the money is in pain, but can’t you make the “family & friends” pages on the brain cooties sections as good as the one for diabetic nerve pain?
  • Cymbalta Pregnancy Registry. Why would a drug that is pregnancy category C and has no report of human side show freaks in the PI sheet need a pregnancy registry? Because Lilly has good lawyers. I can’t tell if Cymbalta has actually caused any birth defects or miscarriages or not. The only references to Cymbalta and birth defects, miscarriages, etc. that I can find are on lawsuit and fearmonger sites.

PI Sheets from Around the World

The health departments of some of Spain’s numerous autonomous communities (and they are pretty damn autonomous) publish their own SPCs and PILs. Here are some I found, and found somewhat interesting:

Although published by the local governments, the SPCs are much shorter in the local languages than the ones in Spanish. I don’t know if that’s due to translation difficulties or what. Still, at least they’re publishing SPCs and PILs in Basque, Catalan, and probably all the other languages spoken in Spain.

Rating & Review Sites

Other Sites of Interest

DrugsDB.com’s Cymbalta Page Return to Table of Contents

Discussion board

If you have any questions not answered here, please see the Crazymeds Cymbalta discussion board. Return to Table of Contents


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References

  1. Cymbalta’s Full US Prescribing Information
  2. Faught, Edward. “Topiramate in the treatment of partial and generalized epilepsy.” Neuropsychiatric disease and treatment 3.6 (2007): 811-821.
  3. Stahl’s Essential Psychopharmacology: Neuroscientific Basis and Practical Applications (Essential Psychopharmacology Series) Third edition ISBN:978-0521673761 by Stephen M. Stahl © 2008 Published by Cambridge University Press.
  4. Primer of Drug Action 12th edition by Robert M. Julien Ph.D, Claire D. Advokat, Joseph Comaty © 2011 ISBN:978-1429233439 Published by Worth Publishers.
  5. The Prescriber’s Guide (Essential Psychopharmacology Series) Third edition by Stephen Stahl © 2009 Published by Cambridge University Press.
  6. Clinical Handbook of Psychotropic Drugs 20th edition Adil S. Virani, K. Bezchlibnyk-Butler, J. Jeffries © 2009 Published by Hogrefe & Huber Publishers.
  7. Mosby’s Drug Consult 2007 (Generic Prescription Physician’s Reference Book Series) © 2007 An imprint of Elsevier.
  8. PDR: Physicians’ Desk Reference 2010 64th edition
  9. Duloxetine: A New Treatment for the Emotional and Physical Symptoms of Depression
  10. Duloxetine in the treatment of major depressive disorder
  11. Duloxetine in the treatment of generalized anxiety disorder
  12. Duloxetine for the treatment of generalized anxiety disorder: a review
  13. Duloxetine in the treatment of chronic pain due to fibromyalgia and diabetic neuropathy
  14. Duloxetine for the treatment of fibromyalgia
  15. Review of duloxetine in the management of diabetic peripheral neuropathic pain
  16. Duloxetine: A New Pharmacologic Therapy for Stress Urinary Incontinence
  17. Duloxetine in the treatment of stress urinary incontinence
  18. Population pharmacokinetics of orally administered duloxetine in patients: implications for dosing recommendation

Return to Table of Contents


1 Sometime between one day and never is the usual estimate for any drug to start working on fibromyalgia. It's pretty obvious I lived with someone who hasn't had much luck treating her fibro isn't it?

2 I honestly don't know if Cymbalta samples are still a thing.

3 As well as being an indication of half of said conditions.

4 Based on Julien's calculations from A Primer of Drug Action, the half-life multiplied by five is the generally accepted estimate of how long it takes a single dose of any given drug to be eliminated from the blood stream/plasma of someone with a normal metabolism. That's also the rough estimate for steady state if they can't get, or won't provide a number for that.

5 For crazy meds. I have no idea what the average complete clearance is for other types of medications. For all I know there are drugs that utterly vanish from your system in under five passes, and others that won't let go of your squishy bits for years after you stop taking them.

6 Outside of the military and similar cultures with a "walk it off" attitude for anything that isn't cancer.

7 I.e. Not NAMBLA's NAMI's useless stigma busting campaigns that spend too much time and money combating sitcoms, TV commercials, and arguing about using "patient" or "consumer" in literature. Oh, and they haven't done anything since January 2011.

8 Thank you! I'll be here all weak. Be sure to tip your content provider. And don't try the veal, it's cruelicious!


If you have any questions not answered here, please see the Crazymeds Cymbalta discussion board. We welcome criticisms of the articles, notifications of bad links, site problems, consumer experiences with medications, etc. I’m not always able to write back. Hence I never answer questions about meds via e-mail that are answered by this or other articles. Especially if they have been repeatedly asked on the forum. That’s why we write these damn things. Questions about which meds are best for your condition should also be asked on the forum; because this is a free site, so the price of admission is making things easier for somebody else searching for the same answer. We don’t deal with children on the forum or in private because after doing this for ten years I don’t have the emotional stamina to deal with kids who have brain cooties. How to contact Crazymeds. — Jerod Poore, CME, Publisher Crazymeds (crazymeds.us)


Last modified on Wednesday, 04 May, 2016 at 17:03:03 by JerodPoorePage Author Date created April 05, 2011, at 15:24:23
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Cymbalta, and all other drug names on this page and used throughout the site, are a trademark of someone else. Cymbalta’s PI Sheet will probably have the name of the manufacturer and trademark owner (they’re not always the same company) at or near the very bottom. Or ask Google who the owner is. The way pharmaceutical companies buy each other and swap products like Monopoly™ real estate, the ownership of the trademark may have changed without my noticing. It may of changed hands by the time you finished reading this article.




Page design and explanatory material by Jerod Poore, copyright © 2003 - 2016. All rights reserved.
Keep up with Crazymeds and and/or my slow descent into irreparable madness boring life. Pick your preferred social media target(s):

Almost all of the material on this site is by Jerod Poore and is copyright © 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, and 2016 Jerod Poore. Except, of course, the PI sheets - those are the property of the drug companies who developed the drugs the sheets are about - and any documents that are written by other people which may be posted to this site will remain the property of the original authors. You cannot reproduce this page or any other material on this site outside of the boundaries of fair use copying without the express permission of the copyright holder. That’s usually me, so just ask first. That means if want to print out a few pages to take to your doctor, therapist, counselor, support group, non-understanding family members or something like that - then that’s OK to just do. Go for it! Please. As long as you include this copyright notice and something along the lines of following disclaimer, I’m usually cool with it.



All rights reserved. No warranty is expressed or implied in this information. Consult one or more doctors and/or pharmacists before taking, or changing how you take any neurological and/or psychiatric medication. Your mileage may vary. What happened to us won’t necessarily happen to you. If you still have questions about a medication or condition that were not answered on any of the pages you read, please ask them on Crazy Talk: the Crazymeds Forum.
The information on Crazymeds pertains to and is intended for adults. While some information about children and adolescents is occasionally presented (e.g. US FDA approvals), pediatric-specific data such as dosages, side effects, off-label applications, etc. are rarely included in the articles on drugs or discussed on the forum. If you are looking for information regarding meds for children you’ll have to go somewhere else. Plus we are big pottymouths and talk about S-E-X a lot.
Know your sources!
Nobody on this site is a doctor, a therapist, or a pharmacist. We don’t portray them either here or on TV. Only doctors can diagnose and treat an illness. While it’s not as bad as it used to be, some doctors still get pissed off by patients who know too much about medications, so tread lightly when and where appropriate. Diagnosing yourself from a website is like defending yourself in court, you suddenly have a fool for a doctor. Don’t be a cyberchondriac, thinking you have every disease you see a website about, or that you’ll get every side effect from every medication1. Self-prescribing is as dangerous as buying meds from fraudulent online pharmacies that promise you medications without prescriptions.
All information on this site has been obtained from the medications’ product information / summary of product characteristic (PI/SPC) sheets and/or medication guides - which is all you get from sites like WebMD, RxList, NAMBLA NAMI, etc., the sources that are referenced throughout the site, our personal experience and the experiences family, friends, and what people have reported on various reputable sites all over teh intergoogles. As such the information presented here is not intended as a substitute for real medical advice from your real doctor, just a compliment to it. You should never, ever, replace what a real doctor tells you with something from a website on the Internet. The farthest you should ever take it is getting a second opinion from another real doctor. Educate yourself - always read the PI/SPC sheet or medication guide/patient information leaflet (PIL) that comes with your medications and never ever throw them away. OK, you can throw away duplicate copies, but keep at least one, as that’s your proof of purchase of having taken a med in case a doctor doubts your medical history. Plus they take up less space than a bottle, although keeping one inside of a pill bottle is even better.
Crazymeds is not responsible for the content of sites we provide links to. We like them, or they’re paid advertisements, or they’re something else we think you should read to help you make an informed decision about a particular med. Sometimes they’re more than one of those things. But what’s on those sites is their business, not ours.
Very little information about visitors to this site is collected or saved. From time to time I look at search terms used and which pages they bring up in an effort to make the information I present more relevant. And the country of origin, just because I’m geeky like that. That’s about it. Depending on how you feel about Schrodinger, our privacy policy should either assuage or exacerbate your paranoia.
Crazymeds is optimized for ridiculously large screens and browsers that don’t block ads. I use Firefox and Chrome, running under Windows 72. On a computer that sits on top of my desk. With a 23 inch monitor. Hey, at least you can make the text larger or smaller by clicking on the + or - buttons in the upper right hand corner. If you have Java enabled. Like 99% of the websites on the planet, Crazymeds is hosted on domain running an open source operating system with a variety of open source applications, including the software used to display what you’ve been reading. As such Crazymeds is not responsible for whatever weird shit your browser does or does not do when you read this site3.
Crazymeds now uses a secure server, but it is not so secure that you can discuss anything having to do with nuclear power facilities, air traffic control systems, aircraft navigation systems, weapons control systems, or any other system requiring failsafe operation whose failure could lead to injury, death or environmental damage. Just so you know. So if you’re mentally interesting and have a job that deals with that sort of thing, talk about said job elsewhere. Otherwise feel free to discuss your meds and brain cooties.
No neurologists, psychiatrists, therapists or pharmacists were harmed in the production of this website. Use only as directed. Void where prohibited. Contains nuts. Certain restrictions may apply. All data are subject to availability. Not available on all mobile devices, in the 12 Galaxies Guiltied to a Zegnatronic Rocket Society, or in all dimensions of reality. Hail Xenu!

‘Everything is true, nothing is permitted.’ - Jerod Poore


1 While there are plenty of books to help you with hypochondria, for some reason there’s not much in the way of websites. Then again, staying off of the Internet is a large part of curing/managing the disorder.

2 Remember kids, Microsloth operating systems are like TOS Star Trek movies with in that every other one sucks way, way more. With TOS Star Trek movies you don’t want to bother watching the odd-numbered ones. With Microsloth OS you don’t want to buy and install the even-numbered ones. Anyone who remembers ME and Vista knows what I mean.

3 Have I mentioned how open source operating systems for commercial applications is one of the dumbest ideas in the history of dumb ideas?* I don’t even need my big-ass rant any more. Heartbleed has made my case for me. And that’s just the one that got all the media attention. The very nature of an open source operating system makes security as much of an illusion as anonymity on teh Intergoogles. Before you flip out too much: the domain Crazymeds is hosted on uses a version of SSL that is not affected by the Heartbleed bug. That’s one of the many reasons why I pay a lot of money and keep this site on Lunarpages.

* Yes, I know I’m using open source browsers. I also test the site using the now-defunct IE and Safari browsers. Their popularity - and superiority - killed IE and Safari, so that’s why I rely on the open source browsers. It’s like brand vs. generic meds. Sometimes the generic is better than the brand.

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